My oldest child, Alanna, is leaving for college this month. She is ready and I am beyond happy and excited for her. However, I cannot deny that mixed with joy is a quality of sadness threaded throughout this process of letting go. Alanna is leaving the nest,our nest. Her world will expand immensely as she meets new people and explores amazing opportunities. I sit at times breathless with the realization that everything will feel different and look different at home. Comfort comes with the knowledge that I am not alone. There is a kindred spirit throughout our community of all those who have sent their children, nieces, nephews off to preschool, camp, college etc.. The essential teaching of Bodhichitta is available in this situation as well as in all others. At any time we have a choice to soften our heart and move with grace and openness or to harden our heart and shut down in fear.
My teacher, Parvathi Nanda Nath, taught me that if your heart is broken enough times, it will crack wide open revealing the rawness of genuine sorrow…a feeling of connection to all who have ever loved, all who have ever lost. This teaching of compassion truly resonated with me and from here my interest in understanding how to awaken bodhichitta began. Parvathi often referenced Pema Chodron, an American Buddhist nun, author, and Tibetan meditation master and encouraged me to study Pema’s teachings.
Bodhichitta, the awakened heart, is accessible to all of us. It is often experienced as an expansive feeling of deep connection to something much greater than our individual self. Bodhichitta is also known as the “soft spot ” of the heart. This tender and vulnerable “soft spot” of the heart exists in all of us, but is often shielded by walls we have put up due to past painful experiences. These walls protect us from getting hurt. Openings or cracks in the walls begin to appear because of our inherit desire to love and care about others. Opening the heart and awakening compassion is possible if we can find these cracks in the walls, and come into contact with our “soft spot” and move from tenderness and love rather than from fear. The knowledge that we are not alone whether in suffering or joy and this feeling of shared humanity can be experienced more fully as our capacity for love, compassion and joy expand without boundaries.
There are several practices available to help cultivate bodhichitta including the Loving Kindness meditation ( see Dec 21012 blog), Tonglen and Compassion practice. Pema Chodron book ” The Places that Scare You” offers several practices that support awakening Bodhichitta. To learn more about Pema Chodron please visit www.pemachodronfoundation.org
Namaste – Laura
Leave a Comment